Barrier

I can see them all, friends old and new,
queuing up to dissuade you from any
temptation of falling back to that one
moment of weakness where you fell for me.
That glow in your eyes I felt in my heart
and even though when we moved so close
it felt so right, a barrier of sorts prevented
us from moving any closer than
a cheek kiss and a warm embrace,
so cold with the presence of prevention.
All we could do was sit and speak, and all
I could do was admire the way you spoke
so eloquently and freely, and revel in the lift
inside my heart that your contagious laugh
brought, a lift so genuine that I finally learned
the difference between reality and imagination.

And yet it is the reality of knowing
those whose opinion you value and trust most
will say “nay” to any inkling of lust
you may have felt in our fleeting meeting,
and that such meetings grow further apart
the more time goes by since the end of our
generation’s spell together on our hallowed campus.
“A crush, a fantasy, that was all,” they will insist;
“too soft, overbearing,” they will add,
using the context of history to remind you of
my personality’s fatalist flaws that I cannot escape.
So I left you at the bus stop with yet another hug
and a kiss, your cheek planted so squarely in my
face that your intention could not be misread -
and I left with hands shoved into my pockets,
wondering…where did I go so wrong?