Thoughts

All these random thoughts,
Thoughts of things said and done,
Thoughts of things happening now,
And thoughts of things that will never come to pass,
Swirl around my mind,
Confusing fact and fiction,
Distorting reality,
Destroying dreams…

Everything comes to a head,
Emotional battles past and present
Amalgamate to create a giant war,
One in which I’m accosted on all sides
By a helplessness so helpless
That the idea of the war becomes simply futile,
That the idea of all these wrongs being righted
Is like wishing that love will last forever and that death will cease to occur…

The search for a solution can’t even begin
Amidst the internal shouts and screams
Of the confusion and pain that reigns supreme,
All these random thoughts carry me through each day,
Dismissing sleep as a commodity not needed,
The blurriness of my sight
Simply mirrors the anti-clarity
Of everything happening in my own mind…

Thoughts just flash from one to the other,
Bearing no connection at all,
Yet all of them have a role to play in who I am,
Some are happy, some are angry,
Some are sad, some are heartbreaking,
Yet all are a part of the components of my soul,
These thoughts are all here to stay,
Even if their contents have never taken place or are long gone…