Sometimes and Other Times

(under constant review)

Sometimes, living in the past is what’s best for your mind,
Other times, living in the past destroys the present and the future,
Sometimes, losing your heart’s greatest love inspires you to even greater things,
Other times, losing your heart’s greatest love initiates an irreversible depression,
Sometimes, a torrent of abuse provokes the desired reaction,
Other times, a torrent of abuse merely exasperates everything,
Sometimes, telling the truth cancels out the wrong caused by that truth,
Other times, telling the truth is the final nail in the coffin constructed by that truth,
Sometimes, saying I love you is the hardest thing you could ever have to say,
Other times, saying I love you is so natural and easy that it has to be fake,
Sometimes, showing someone you love them means showing a million others aswell,
Other times, showing someone you love them means telling someone else you hate them,
Sometimes, the brave step up and show everyone why they are labelled ‘the brave’,
Other times, the brave step up and wilt so embarrassingly others wonder how they earned the title of bravery in the first place,
Sometimes, faith can be rewarded in the most unlikely of ways,
Other times, faith can be torn apart in the most unlikely of ways,
Sometimes, your conscience can cause the noblest of actions,
Other times, your conscience simply ceases to exist at all,
Sometimes, a nod and a smile are the best ways to deal with a frown and a grunt,
Other times, a witty remark and a sly wink are the best ways to deal with a frown and a grunt,
Sometimes, the best of us are the ones’ who make martyrs of us all,
Other times, the best of us hold back when most would charge blindly,
Sometimes, the blind see further than the seeing,
Other times, the deaf hear more than the hearing,
Sometimes, people hold back when they should say what needs to be said,
Other times, people say what they should say outright, and destroy everything around them in the process,
Sometimes, the best form of communicating lies in saying nothing,
Other times, one carefully chosen word says everything,
Sometimes, when you make a mistake it's the best for everyone,
Other times, when you make a mistake it's worse for everyone else,
Sometimes, tears fall out of complete joy,
Other times, tears fall because everything else is falling too,
Sometimes, getting up in the morning is the most difficult thing you'll do all day,
Other times, days pass by in a blur until the moment of destiny you've been dreading comes,
Sometimes, turning to a friend is worse than turning to an enemy,
Other times, turning to an enemy brings about circumstances unforeseen,
Sometimes, what you seek the most is closer than you could ever hope to imagine,
Other times, what you seek the most has something to seek all of its own,
Sometimes, the words ‘if’, ‘maybe’ and ‘unsure’ are exactly what’s needed,
Other times, a single doubt causes multiple mayhems…

Sometimes, the world around you begins falling apart…
Other times, this is simply the world coming together…

I 'Get On' to Get On

Gazing from my corner,
Back to the wall,
Listening to the conversations
Of them all,
Over a year’s worth,
Now all gone,
Where’s the contentedness
I knew for so long?
There is no common ground,
It’s uneven and lopsided,
There is no one to whom
I have truly confided,
I sit in the corner,
Eyes in my head,
Trying to remember all
The genuine things said…

I ‘get on’ to get on,
I feign to be a part,
Now it’s all fallen down
And brought me back before the start…

My smile stands alone,
The eyes can’t react,
Yet here I sit still
Due to my stubborn pact,
Cliques are born and bred,
Invitations are extended,
Yet they are all withdrawn
By acts unprecedented,
All the empty gestures,
Concerns and awkward questions,
Compound in my mind
Without any explanations,
The effort is becoming futile,
The truth is coming to light,
Now it’s time to walk away
And stop fighting a losing fight…

I ‘get on’ to get on,
I feign to be a part,
Now it’s all fallen down
And brought me back before the start…

Looking Eyes

She looks at me,
With those looking eyes,
Up and down,
Searching for lies…

I look at her,
Complete innocence,
Void of strife,
Now it makes sense…

Deceit builds up,
Breaking us apart,
We won’t work,
Forced to depart…

Hearts are broken,
Walking away hurts,
Our own fault,
For spouting dirt…

Always so shy,
When being so bland,
A dry mouth,
Swallowing sand…

Loved you always,
Why were you so blind?
Full of hate,
Why so unkind?

Lonely walk time,
Crying my eyes out,
Piecing thoughts,
Shattering doubt…

My mind wonders,
Did I really try?
Then it asks,
Did I just lie?

Which did I do?
What happened to me?
Went astray,
No longer free…

She looked at me,
With those looking eyes,
Up and down,
Finding the lies…

Don't Cry

Please don’t start,
I’ll just follow,
This shouldn’t be sad,
Yet is hard to swallow,
This is a brand new chapter
In a book half filled,
So wipe those tears away
And ignore those already spilled…

Please don’t cry,
Pastures new await,
Please don’t cry,
You’re in the hands of fate…

Your breath I see rising
Up into the bitter morning air,
Even now I see tears forming,
A sight I just can’t bear,
Envy builds inside,
I want to escape this place,
But my time has yet to come,
So I save face…

Please don’t cry,
Pastures new are calling,
Please don’t cry
And add to the tears already falling…

I imagine what it’s like,
The rollercoaster of emotions,
The difficulty of saying goodbye
And the losing of devotions,
Letting go is always harder
Than grabbing hold,
But this is something too unique
To be forsaken in the November cold…

Please don’t cry,
Pastures new are within reach,
Please don’t cry,
Just make your goodbye speech…

When your feet leave the ground
Your tears will fall the hardest,
When they land on new terrain
The smile in place will be the widest,
So let go of the life you’re leaving now,
Look forward at what is to be,
Step blindly into the unexpected
And keep your mind open completely…

Please don’t cry,
Pastures new beckon now,
Please don’t cry,
Just take your final bow…

And live the life you’ve always wanted to live…


(my aunty Catherine moved to Australia in November 2008; this is what I wrote after seeing her off)

Perceptions

I’ve walked with kings
And felt no better,
I’ve danced with queens
And knew no worse…

I’ve dined in halls
And felt insignificant,
I’ve lived in slums
And knew royalty…

Perceptions are futile,
If you get them so wrong,
What you see
Is not what you get…

I’ve gazed at seas
And imagined uprising,
I’ve seen into eyes
And been pacified by sight…

I’ve lived with taunts
And thought them harmless,
I’ve listened intently
And taken them to heart…

Perceptions are futile,
If you get them so wrong,
What you get
Is not what you know…

I’ve slept on stone
And felt right at home,
I’ve rested on pillows
And wished to cry…

I’ve spoken no sense
And known my coherence,
I’ve argued logic with logic
And felt at a loss…

Perceptions are futile,
If you get them so wrong,
What you know
Is not what you hear…

I’ve walked in crowds
And felt on my own,
I’ve walked alone
And felt at perfect ease…

I’ve played in teams
And known isolation,
I’ve been told what to do
And done the complete opposite…

Perceptions are futile,
If you get them so wrong,
What you hear
Is not what it seems…

(this is another song I wrote, and I wrote the lyrics while listening to Imagine Me (As I Am) by Star Crossed Enemies - the only thing about this song/poem is that it doesn't seem to end, but I suppose in a way that's the point because people never stop perceiving things).